Come to a Bonfire night exquisite event,

the invitation said,crepes and bananas flambe cooked by an executive chef no less, it promised. Now, if there is one thing I like it is a pancake.No-one makes them better than my friend Ludka,her inventive fillings are legendary and have to be sampled to be believed. But I like things simple,no fancy footwork for me when the simplest of the simplest will do,a little sugar and a few drops of fresh lemon juice or home-made jam and a sprinkling of ground walnuts.Those of you who have been kind enough to read my travel adventures know, that on this cruise to date I have eaten four desserts only.There were some dark dry fruity squares I liked enormously,a dick with too many spots for dinner neither looked nor tasted the part but I consumed the lot trying to determine what on earth it was the taste reminded me of, but the lot gone I was none the wiser.The apple strudel resembled a cake but a strudel it was not neither in taste nor appearance, but as I love all things appled,I thought I had nothing to lose.And I did lose nothing except my faith in ever getting a dessert to my liking on Columbus.Because even the ice cream was far too sweet for me and thus inedible. But things were about to change I was convinced, thinking of the executive chef and his pancakes.There I was, at the bonfire night exquisite event, three decorations hanging from the staircase across the dance floor, a singer swaying and a couple prancing about heavily, as if they had an executive pancake too many.But no sight of the executive chef or his team.The pans cold and empty.Aah, am too early,I thought,I am always on time for everything,thus often far too early. So I waited.And waited.And waited.And then I decided to wait no longer and went up to my room only to see the naked posterior of a Swedish princess waiting to be enjoyed by Eggsy,the Kingsman. All I wanted was a pancake and did not even get that!